A broken Ronda Rousey has revealed she contemplated suicide in the dramatic moments following her shock UFC title loss to Holly Holm in Melbourne last November.
In a candid chat with US talk show host Ellen DeGeneres, Rousey made the revelation that she “was literally there and thinking about killing myself” as she struggled to come to terms with her UFC Bantamweight Championship loss – which was dubbed the “greatest upset in UFC history”.
Rousey also said her brain “stopped working” until the morning after.
“What am I any more if I’m not this?” a teary Rousey revealed on The Ellen DeGeneres Show.
“I’m like ‘I’m nothing, what do I do anymore and no one gives a s–t about me anymore without this.'”
“To be honest I looked up and I saw my man Travis [UFC heavyweight fighter Travis Browne] was standing up there and I looked up at him and I was like, I need to have his babies. I need to stay alive.
“I don’t know if I would’ve made it without him.”
Rousey has kept a relatively low profile since the fight. She has earmarked a return bout against Holm who will defend her title against Miesha Tate on March 5.
Rousey said her gruelling schedule contributed to her defeat.
“One thing that was different was that it was my third title fight in nine months, and I don’t think anyone has ever attempted that before,” she said.
“I kind of felt tired. I’ve been more tired. I was knocked out the first time I got hit. It’s hard to know what’s going on.
“In that first hit I cut open my whole mouth and I knocked my teeth loose.
“I had no perception. I felt like I couldn’t see. I could see but I couldn’t see how far my hand was from my face. I was swinging blindly. I knew she was out there, but like I really don’t remember most of it. So I was trying my best to kind of hide the fact that I wasn’t even there anymore.”
“My brain stopped working properly.”