Do You Have The Right Opinions About Eggs, Or Are You A Monster?

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I don’t make the rules, I just enforce them.

By Jessie Van Amburg

Hello, I am a writer who has a lot of opinions about food (most recently, about how cauliflower crust is a sham and you should avoid it at all costs).

But if there’s one food topic that incites more debate than Antoni Porowski’s cooking credentials, it’s anything related to eggs.

Nutritionally of course, eggs have been on a roller coaster ride of public approval. First they were good for you. Then they were full of scary cholesterol and MIGHT KILL YOU! Now…most R.D.s agree you shouldn’t be scared to eat them on the reg.

Outside of the health benefits, though, eggs come with their own intense culture and rituals. They come with gear like egg timers, egg cups, even little gadgets to ensure they cook exactly like the eggs in McMuffins (really!). There are whole restaurants dedicated to JUST serving eggs.

And of course, they’re insanely polarizing. Like if I told you that putting ketchup on eggs is an abomination that just disguises crappily-cooked eggs, that already tells you a lot about me. (Like, how I should probably get a life. Fair.)

But how normal are my ideas about eggs? Well, please alert the Pulitzer committee, because this poll on eggs is probably the most ground-breaking journalistic endeavor that will ever be done in the history of humankind (sorry, Ronan Farrow)
Thank you for going on this journey with me.

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